I want to scratch out the word "Whimpy" but can't figure out how.After spending hundreds, if not thousands, of dollars at various doctors of all modalities and told, behind the curtain that was their laptop and not even looking at me, that I just needed to loose weight and leaving said doctor with unanswered questions like how do I do that when I have NO energy? I got angry, not just with myself, but frustrated at the fact that these so-called healers were not paying attention. Yes, I know I'm fat but what is the underlying factors to that? Yes, I know I'm fat and I just paid you $200 to tell me something I already know why?? Yes, I'm fat what else besides diet and exercise is the underlying cause for this? What is happening and what am I doing that diet and exercise are not working? After a doctor had told me to learn to de-stress or serious health conditions could arise I realized, I don't know how! I've never really been educated on how to de-stress. I had not had a good nights sleep in over 10 years, my doctor had just put me on anti-depressants, vertigo was a daily occurrence and my self esteem was, well, there was none.
After much frustration and out of shear surrender a family member suggested I try Ayurveda. I'd never heard of it but I made an appointment in their clinic fully prepared for disappointment. What I found was more than any modern medical healer had ever shared with me. I fell into a modality that not only encompasses compassion and understanding but takes the time to make sure that you are fully aware of how you got to where you are and what you can do to make the changes within you in order to get better and be a better person. After a month of visiting the clinic I became more and more interested and as time passed, my interest became stronger and decided that instead of depending on someone else to tell me how to live better, I would educate myself so I could answer these questions for myself. During one of the first classes we had to introduce ourselves and talk a little about why and what brought us to study Ayurveda. I remember saying that after many years of self education and working on my own health this was the last step in my healing. I also remember my teacher saying "It's the cherry on the top of the Ice Cream Sunday". If I knew then what I know now I would have chosen different words.
I can't stress enough that when you know something is off balance and you can feel it in your bones that you are not imagining it; seek out anything and everything that sparks an interest. That interest just might turn into something so awesomely life changing that you find yourself taking back your life in such a powerful way that negativity, hurtful thoughts or toxic people take notice and want to change because they see the lightness in you that is unsurpassed.
I am grateful for the knowledge that has been entrusted to me and am excited to apply this knowledge further in my life and to others who are struggling.
I had a teacher once say "Everyone is fine but we could all be finer". These last two years have not only been the cherry but I have a whole new different flavor of Ice Cream Sunday.
